Focus On... Hereford

SMBU soccer historian Paul Hunchback looks back at connections between Hereford and Wanderers ahead of tomorrow's game.

Marketing Ache
Officials at Hereford are urging Wanderers supporters to arrive at Edgar Street early on Saturday as they have designated the day “High Wycombe Day for people from High Wycombe and Marlow”. Attractions include an opportunity to race flying postman John Williams who played for both clubs in his long career. “He’s 40 in May”, said a spokesman, “he’s probably slowed to shit.” Brian McGorry will also be present at the stadium and will be handing out hair care tips, mainly concerning ratty highlights. Former Watford legend Clint Easton was invited to speak but has refused to get involved due to a reason. Let’s hope he improves over the next 12 months or so.

Tom Tom
Wycombe fans are expected to flock to Hereford cathedral on Saturday to gawp at the Mappa Mundi, a confusing but popular medieval map of the world. Local historians such as my injured son Goran Hunchback are keen to study the authors’ details of south Buckinghamshire which have caused such controversy in recent months. The inclusion of Amersham bypass, built in 1987, has led to some people questioning the authenticity of the map but the Pope told them to leave it. The Catholic Church has declared Saturday as “Mappa Mundi Day” and has asked both sides to wear chainmail and arrive at the ground on aggressive horses.

Something Different
The Football League has declared Saturday as “Football Afternoon Day”. Fans are being encouraged to do something a bit different and come to the ground and watch a couple of football teams run around for a couple of hours. Attractions include colourful nylon replica shirts, popular American food such as burgers and hot dogs, PA systems turned up a bit too loud, tuneless chanting, sighing and ample urinals. Anyone wanting to come to the Hereford v Wycombe game must apply in writing and prepare to watch the game from inside a cage as police have insisted that tourist fans may be killed by regulars.

14.03.2008. 11:32

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